I can’t prove there is a god. All I can say is that I have faith in god and it works for me. I don’t need to unravel my beliefs, and I don’t care whether anyone else has the same belief. It neither validates nor invalidates mine.
Having a higher power in my life has helped me get through a lot of situations and saved me from despair. There have been a couple of events that caused me so much pain, I would have imploded if I couldn’t take that pain and fear somewhere. All I knew to do was pray.
I don’t believe in divine order or a “good reason,” for everything that happens. Of course there is a reason for every death and tragedy but it doesn’t mean those things are from up high. It means that things happen, and people have free will for good , evil and anything in between.
I believe that I get my strength from my higher power that I call god, to deal with whatever I need to get through, to have to thank for my inner will, and so that I can feel part of something greater than myself, and I know that life does not end with me. I love the spiritual writing of Victor Frankl, Martin Buber, Harold Kushner and Abraham Twerski, and others.
I pray every day because it makes me know that I’m not alone, that there is more than the material world and that I’m one with other people on this earth.
Eight years ago I was in the hospital, and didn’t know if I would leave alive. I was terrified. I knew that somewhere inside me, was an inner strength and belief, but all I could think about was fear of death. The only thing I knew to do was to call for help through my own prayer, and ask people to pray for me, I wouldn’t be alone. My rabbi came and prayed. I had other Jewish people from different denominations pray. Several people went to the Catholic Church and lit candles, fundamentalist Christian friends, and Baptists prayed. I had the Buddhists, Hindis, Muslims, Yoruba/Candomble, Church of Religious Science and a Unity Church Minister praying for me. I even had atheist friends send me good vibes. I believe that the belief in all of that helped me recover, and not get so lost in fear that I couldn’t find my way.
I don’t believe that god controls everything that happens to me. I’m just not that important in the scheme of life. I believe that war, killing and cruelty are anti-god but people control that.
I don’t often share my religious and spiritual views because they are so personal.